This is a great series because it helps put a real person to the avatar. The joys of tweetups, conferences etc… are that they help us realize just who eachother is. Without actual human connections, social media would not exist. I was more than happy to participate in something like this, even though I hate being on camera.

Let me know what you think in the comments!

Social media has created great opportunities for us to meet, interact and connect with scores of new people. But very rarely do we meet new friends. Let’s start by defining a friend. I found a Ralph Waldo Emerson quote, “It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.” But I want to go a bit further. Here’s how I’ve defined a friendship:

A friend is a person that you can share emotions with, share a meal with and share a memory with. A friend invites two-way communication and is not a one-sided relationship. A friend has earned your respect and a friend will be there when you need him or her.

Making friends

I’m curious how you make friends. As a society, our social skills are shifting online. People’s popularity is determined by the number of Myspace friends or the number of followers on Twitter. But we still are wired to crave human interaction. And that’s where friends come in to play.

Making friends is incredibly difficult as you get older. As geeks, we love heading to meetups, Tweetups and drinkups. That’s a sociological behavior. We are able to congregate due to a common interest. In fact, an article from the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Administration says “To meet new people who might become your friends, you have to go to places where others are gathered.”

But it’s hard to begin a friendship by exchanging business cards. These networking gatherings are just that — networking. Making a true friend is a challenge.

Keeping friends

I don’t mean to say that it inpossible to make new, true friends. In fact, I have made connections that I am beginning to consider friends. But how do you keep them, how do you transition from contact to friendship. I think it all begins with that skill most of us have: communication.

All of these tools can now be used as a friendship building device. Send somebody a DM on Twitter to meetup for coffee. Create an event on Facebook and invite people to your house for a wine tasting. See, social media CAN be used for good.

I would love to know what you think about this and how you make and keep friends.